“Did You Sign that Paper?” and Other Doormat Reminders for Parents

Written by Emily

There’s a school photo floating around the internet of an irritated boy in his pjs because someone mixed up Picture Day and Pajama Day. I feel for the kid; I really do. But I feel for the adults in his life, too. I may or may not have mixed up Pajama Day and Ice Cream Social Day. Chloe may or may not have gone to school in a robe, sunshine jammies, and slippers when the rest of her classmates were fully dressed. I’m grateful there wasn’t a camera on the scene, not because Chloe cared one bit, but because I’m the negligent parent. Her teacher and I had a little chuckle about it in the hallway at pick-up, but I’m sure she made a note about me in her file. It read: IDIOT.

I discovered an Etsy seller called BeThereInFive, who makes doormats with three simple reminders: turn off the curling iron, turn off the straightener, did you remember lunch? Great idea.

I’d like to see a line of doormats specifically designed to help parents. There are entirely too many special days, special events, and papers to sign to keep it all straight. I think a reminder mat at every doorway in the house might do the trick.

 

Signed

This handy mat could cut down on hasty permission slip signatures in the school parking lot when the only writing implement is the butt end of a chewed crayon. Or maybe not.

chaperone

Just keep a chaperone bag in the trunk of the car. Make sure you have sunscreen, snacks, wipes, tissues, spare change, and your sanity in there.

creatures

 

elf

Everyone needs a holiday mat.

 

gameday

The answer is yes. It’s always yes.

pictureday

yes

face

Perhaps a nifty mat would spare a few kids the embarrassment of having their mothers rub spit all over their faces to remove yogurt mustaches or toothpaste residue.

snacks

Probably.

crust

It’s just banana. We hope.

timeout

 

Why not? We’re the only people in the house that will really appreciate a few minutes of exile. We deserve it.



Categories: Emily, Family, Home

Tags: , , , , ,

15 replies

  1. Brilliant! This made me laugh before 6:00 in the morning.
    I won’t go into specifics, but I could use an exit mat that says,”Take off your slippers and put on your shoes.”

    • Well, I take that as a personal victory because I have never laughed before 6:00 in the morning! Thank you! And I might like to hear the specifics of that story!

      Thanks so much for reading and commenting!

      • Heh. Well, let’s just say I was in that sleep-deprived fog that overtakes one when one has a young baby. I was almost to the grocery store and I looked down and saw slippers instead of shoes. (And they weren’t the kind of slippers that could kind of pass for shoes.) It didn’t seem worth the trouble to turn around and go back home to change (Iet’s call it “sleep-deprived-fog-induced laziness) so I didn’t bother. I’m not sure anyone in the store noticed, although I felt a little self-conscious. Just a little, though. Sleep deprivation also makes me apathetic, evidently. 😉

  2. haha! this is awesome!! My favorites are “Are you the chaperone? Why?” and “Did you move the Elf?” lol brilliant. I hadn’t seen that kid’s picture but it is priceless!

  3. Brilliant! I’m sure we all could add a few to the list! I remember the spelling bee I forgot!

  4. Did you move the Elf? hahahahahaha. My fav is the “is there a game? a recital?” etc. I was laughing this weekend in church because Mr. T and I are in the Easter performance at church, He is the lead in the next school play, he is the school Mascot and he is also now in competition cheer (which makes me a cheer mom. I am the opposite of a cheer mom, but that’s a whole different story!) but between all of his stuff, my stuff and other family stuff, you are right, there is always something!

    • Your schedule is packed, Kate. That’s crazy! But it all sounds fun and exciting. You’ll be tired by the end, but you’ll be smiling! How wonderful that he is the lead in the school play! And the school mascot! He is quite the performer! I love it!

  5. Yes. Yes. And Yes!

  6. Ha! I love the one about the holidays. Especially the magical thing you never heard of!! So perfect!

    • I live in fear of the new magical thing. I’m relieved I didn’t have to stage a mischievous leprechaun attack! Thanks so much for reading, commenting and sharing! I truly appreciate it!

  7. Thankfully, kids have backpacks (at least while they are young) and you have a ghost of a chance to go into them & find out (from the never ending list) what you were supposed to remember NOT to forget ( >:) So funny! Could have used those mats SO many times. I was thankful the Lord spread out the births of our 4 children, or I’d have never made it had they been really close in age!
    Love your writing, Em!!

    • I know you were a busy woman (and still are)! Recitals, competitions, sporting events, the list went on and on and on. And you handled it all with grace! Thank you so much for reading and commenting. It means so much!

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