Dear F-ing Fans,

Written by Rose

I, my f-ing husband and daughters, f-ing love to see the f-ing Pens play

We spent f-ing $300 and this is what I have to f-ing say;

F-ing sports fans in f-ing Jersey and f-ing all over today,

F-ing feel that f-ing obscenity is f-ing OK.

The f-ing things they yell, f-bombs and f-ing more indeed,

Made me f-ing disappointed, made my f-ing ears bleed.

We’d f-ing brought our children with us, little did we f-ing know;

We’d leave the f-ing game regretting we f-ing did so.

Gone are the f-ing days when f-ing fans are classy whether f-ing tied, lost or won,

When live sports f-ing games were f-ing family fun.

When all f-ing scoring is followed by “You suck!” and f-ing worse

When our kids f-ing ears heard f-ing filth– f-ing perverse

When we f-ing left, boots tromping through f-ing slush,

It f-ing came to me suddenly in an f-ing rush,

“The masses are over-Reality-TVed, so over shock-and-awed,

Crude is no longer offensive, drunken obscenities are reasons for applause,

Freedom of speech, to give people free voice,

Has come to mean “curse, offend and in crudity rejoice!

You won’t get arrested; Be obscene not ashamed,

(if you object in the grandstands you may just be maimed!)”.

It happened so slowly and like a disease,

Generations shouting “F-you!” and “Crosby, take it on your knees…!”

It’s not OK; it’s not “part of the game” nor “only society’s dregs”,

It’s not “modern lexicon”, not “stadium beer” nor a “few bad eggs”,

It’s low class and high end, it’s Madison Ave and Main St

The obscenity says self respect is gone,  schools and businesses replete.

Self-respect, “F-ing A”.  I respect you- NOT.

Somehow rawness is cool, crudeness is hot.

You red-faced-screamer, are you so ill equipped

That your dedicated support can only be filthy-lipped?

I bet players love fans yelling what their mommas do?

And the endless screeches from 300-section-you-know-who?

As I dry-clean our daughter’s beer-laden coat I know

It will be ear plugs for all IF a next time we go.

Live crowds- I love what they used to be;

The roar, the energy, the camaraderie.

The occasional verbal “penalty”, OK.

But there are “10-minute majors” every minute today!

The colorful language is why we won’t soon make plans,

Dear crude, obscene, f-ing fans.

Categories: Emily

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

3 replies

  1. Well said. I haven’t been to any such sporting events lately, but I am glad to hear that I am not the only one offended by the the constant barrage of the “F” bomb dropping everywhere you go. It’s pollution to our ears!

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